Just Breath
by Harrypotterchick1
Summary: Pre-Serum. Steve is seriously sick with pneumonia, and no one knows if is going to make it to see tomorrow. Oh yeah, no slash between Bucky and Steve. T just to be safe, though.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Well, here I am again. Writing another Captain America fanfiction. Hope you enjoy reading!**

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Captain America characters. Though I wish I did, I don't.**

**Dedication: I have to dedicate this fanfiction to one of my best friends, Lylon. She might be reading this, most likely if I forced her to, but she is an amazing friend. We actually do this cosplay thing where I call her 'Bucky' and she calls me 'Steve'. She is my Bucky :)**

* * *

"C'mon, ask her out!" Bucky said, elbowing Steve. Both were walking home from a shift at the local department store, where they both worked at the time.

"I'm starting to regret saying anything about her." Steve muttered, kicking a rock with his left foot.

"Steve, c'mon we are what, nineteen?" Bucky pointed out, and Steve shrugged.

"Well, people aren't lining up to date a boy they might step on…" Steve muttered.

"She looks nice enough," Bucky said. "This is just what you need! A nice girl to get you going on in life!"

"I don't need anyone, I can manage."

"You are just too proud and too shy." Bucky said, slyly smiling.

"I am not!" Steve yelled back.

"Then ask her out already!" Bucky said, getting an elbow in the ribs.

"Oh just shut up already, I am not going to ask anyone out on any stupid dates, so leave me alone already!" Steve said, causing Bucky to laugh.

"Hey, I'm just saying you too would look cute together, that's all." Bucky shrugged, still laughing.

"Well, stop playing match-maker on me, would ya?" Steve asked, and both started laughing all over again.

All was perfectly normal, two best friends laughing, walking down the side of the unoccupied road. It seemed as though everything was perfect.

That is, until Steve started coughing.

At first, this was normal, Steve being sick all the time and having asthma. Bucky pounded Steve on the back, but that did nothing.

"Hey, dude, are you okay?" Bucky asked, kneeling in front of Steve.

"Can't…breathe…" Steve managed to say, coughing and gasping for air.

Bucky made a quick grab for Steve's inhaler out of his own coat pocket, and handed it to Steve, who quickly started inhaling quickly. After a while he took the inhaler out of his mouth and took a deep breath.

"Are you alright, Steve?" Bucky asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Steve shrugged off, shakily. "But can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure." Bucky said.

"Why do you have my inhaler in your coat pocket?"

"Oh, just in case." Bucky said, before smiling. "Are you complaining that I saved your life?"

"No," Steve grinned and shook his head. "It's just odd how you are more prepared to save me then I am."

"I guess." Bucky shrugged. "But really Steve, are you sure you are alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine." Steve assured him, but coughed twice after saying this.

"Yes, very convincing." Bucky muttered, frowning.

* * *

**A/N: Well? What did you think? Please feel free to review, or favorite, or follow. I would love any :) Thanks to you who have read it. And stay tuned for more!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you SO MUCH for all the followers and favorites! A thank you to the three of you who reviewed: Lily, Cruelest Sea, and VioletErin.26! I loved reading all your reviews! Anyway, here is the next chapter:**

* * *

Bucky turned the key in the lock, which clicked and opened slightly. Bucky stepped through, and walked down the hallway to Steve's room.

Ever since Steve's mom died, Bucky always kept a key to Steve's apartment wherever he went. That way, if anything ever happened and Steve needed him, he could be there right away.

Bucky stepped lightly in front of Steve's door, and knocked on the white wood.

"Steve? Are you in there?" Bucky asked.

"Yeah, come in." A dry voice sounded from inside the room. Bucky opened the door, and saw Steve lying on his bed, body facing the ceiling.

"What's wrong, Steve?" Bucky asked, softly. He walked up to the bed, sitting on the edge of it.

"I'm alright, nothing to worry about." Steve croaked.

"Yeah, you were just absent from work today, didn't answer your door, and sound like you are dying. Nothing is wrong indeed. Now, spit it out already!" Bucky said.

"I don't know what it is, Bucky. I have a fever, though." Steve nodded to his side table, where the thermometer lay.

Bucky frowned. "Should you see a doctor?"

"No, I'll be fine." Steve coughed.

"Yesterday, when you had a coughing fit, did that have anything to do with this?" Bucky asked, and Steve shrugged.

"Maybe, I don't know." Steve sat up, and started coughing nonstop again. Bucky grabbed Steve's inhaler, which was only on the side table now, and gave it to Steve.

"Steve, you're coming with me." Bucky said after Steve had stopped coughing.

"What? Why? Where are we going?" Steve asked.

"We are taking you, my friend, to see a doctor." Bucky stood up, and pulled Steve out of bed.

"Bucky, you worry too much." Steve shook his head, and took his hand that was pulling him out of bed.

"No, I never worry. That's why it's weird that this time I am." Bucky replied, walking with Steve out the door.

* * *

Bucky sat alone on a chair in the empty waiting room. A soft buzz of music was above him, and the wall's paint was slightly peeling. He bit his lip, staring up from his shoes. Why was this taking so long?

After what seemed like forever, a doctor walked through the door.

"Are you James Barnes?" The doctor asked.

"Yeah; where is Steve?" Bucky asked, standing up.

"Slow down. Please, take a seat." The doctor nodded at the chair he was once sitting in. Bucky hesitated, but sat down anyway.

"Your friend, Steve, is very ill." The doctor explained, and Bucky felt his heart drop to his feet.

"What do you mean? What is wrong with him?" Bucky asked quickly, worry showing on his face.

"We thought this may be coming soon, giving the fact that he has asthma." The doctor said.

"Has what?" Bucky asked, raising his voice slightly. The doctor didn't seem to notice.

"James, your best friend has pneumonia." The doctor said. Silence came from both of them for a bit, Bucky looking for a ray of hope anywhere.

"But that's a small disease, right? I got pneumonia when I was three." Bucky said, feeling hope rising ever so slightly again. But, seeing the look on the doctor's face, it seemed as though all hope was lost.

"That was when you were a small child; it was different for you back then. But, Steve has had many other diseases, sometimes only just making it." The doctor said.

"But, he has made all of those. He'll be fine, right?" Bucky asked, voice raising and the want of hope showing in his eyes. The doctor looked solemnly at the floor.

"I don't know about this time. I am very glad you took him here today, but I think it may be too late."

Bucky felt hot tears prick his eyes, but blinked them back furiously.

"May I see him?" Bucky asked, quietly.

"Of course you may." The doctor said, and stepped back to let Bucky through.

Bucky walked through the hall, nurses glancing his way. He ignored every one of them. He walked, feeling as though the hallway would never end. Every foot step seemed to echo too loud. He felt alone, though there were many people around him. He turned a corner, and glanced into one of the open doors. Steve was sitting on the bench, back against the wall, eyes up at the ceiling.

"They told you, didn't they Buck?" Steve asked quietly, not taking his eyes down.

"Oh Steve…" Bucky resisted the urge to cry, which he never did. "Steve, I'm sorry, this is all my fault." He said.

Steve looked down from the ceiling. "What are you talking about?" He asked.

"I was worried ever since yesterday, I thought something was wrong. If I brought you in yesterday, maybe the doctors could've done something." Bucky explained, the urge to cry becoming stronger and stronger.

"Bucky, this isn't your fault." Steve said. "None of this is."

"Yes, it is!" Bucky exclaimed.

"No, I'm my own person, Bucky. I can take care of myself. I should've realized something was wrong, but I didn't." Bucky opened his mouth to argue again, but closed it shut. If these were his last moments with Steve, he didn't want to spend the whole time fighting with him.

"This is none of our faults, Steve. This is just the way life is. I'm just terrified."

Steve stared out the window near the south wall. "I am too, Bucky." He whispered.

* * *

**A/N: I hope the next chapter will come soon. Thanks for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I am a liar, this chapter didn't come out as quick as I wanted it to. I can go into detail about the ending of school, babysitting, and so many more reasons on why I didn't finish this chapter as quickly as I wanted it to, but I won't. Anyway, a thank you to the review from BionicLily. Anyway, enough talking, here is the next chapter:**

* * *

Steve was moved to a hospital later in the week. Every day seemed to move by slow, alone in his room. At four thirty to eight, though, Bucky finally came in from work and sat by Steve's bed, making Steve talk and laugh. Hospital days were almost enjoyable when Bucky was there.

Bucky enjoyed it there also. Not only was there bunches of cute nurses at the hospital, but it was just fun being with Steve, even if he couldn't really get out of bed. Yes, hospital days were enjoyable, aside from the fact that Bucky still wasn't sure if Steve was going to make it or not.

It was later in the week when it happened. Bucky was going in to see Steve, as usual, but a doctor stopped him.

"James, we have to talk to you." The doctor said when Bucky got up to the front desk.

"What's going on?" Bucky asked, happiness being replaced quickly by worry.

"Not here, in that room." The doctor nodded towards an empty room close by.

When both fitted into the room, the doctor started.

"We have been keeping track of Steve Roger's progress, but his pneumonia has been getting worse. We are afraid he isn't going to make it."

Bucky felt his heart stop. The world seemed in slow motion, coming slowly to an end. It didn't seem possible. It couldn't be possible.

"Is there any way…"

"There is a eighty-eight percent chance he isn't going to make it." The doctor responded. Bucky felt the world crashing down on him.

"When is he going to…you know…?" Bucky said, not able to get the horrible word 'die' out of his throat.

"This Friday."

"What!?" Bucky jumped. "But that's five days from now!"

"We are well aware of the short timing, but there's nothing we can do." The doctor said.

"Does Steve know anything about this?" Bucky asked, hoping so for he did not want to tell him.

"We told him as soon as we found out." The doctor replied.

"Alright. May I see him now?"

"Yes. Please, take as much time as you need." The doctor stepped aside to let Bucky out of the room.

He walked down the hallways, hands in his pockets, head facing down to the ground. Nurses moved around him, sometimes bumping him against the shoulder, muttering 'Excuse me', but Bucky couldn't notice any of them.

He got to the same room as he always stood in front of. Usually, though, he just went right in, grinning and about to tell Steve what had happened at work or something like that. Now he had nothing to tell Steve. What the doctor told both of them was enough.

Bucky opened the door, and saw Steve lying on the bed, clutching hard onto some bed sheets, head sideways on the pillow towards the door. His eyes were red from what seemed like crying.

"Bucky, I have something to tell you." He said as soon as Bucky closed the door behind him.

"I've heard." Bucky replied, not even having to hear what Steve was going to say.

"Bucky… I'm scared."

Bucky looked down at the pale, weak boy's face. "I know you are, Steve. I am too."

* * *

The days passed too quickly. Bucky got off work earlier than usual to see Steve, face getting paler and body getting weaker. Steve's eyes always looked heavy from not getting enough sleep.

The day was coming up; both Bucky and Steve knew it.

"Bucky?" Steve asked one day.

"Yes, Steve?" Bucky asked.

"Isn't there a possibility I'm gonna live?"

"All we can do is hope, Steve." Bucky said, not sure how else to answer the question. He didn't know. He didn't know anything anymore…

* * *

The day finally came. It was Friday. It was the day that hope is all they had. It was the day that no one knew what would happen. It was the day the day that decided both of their futures…

Bucky took the whole day off from work that Friday. That night, he couldn't sleep. Whenever he did, it was very vague but he still woke up sweating.

The next morning, Bucky swung his legs over the bed, and threw on a tee-shirt. He felt sick to his stomach, unable to eat anything.

He wiped the sweat off his face, picked up his keys, and walked out the door and out to the car. He could hardly focus on the traffic ahead.

He walked through the hospital doors the way he had what seemed like a hundred times before, but never with the feeling he was feeling that day. He walked through the halls, not paying any attention to the nurses, keeping his head down, unable to look up.

He stood in front of Steve's doors, right hand hesitating on the door knob. He let out a sigh, and walked in.

* * *

**A/N: I really hope the next chapter comes soon, but I have a couple things going on that might hold me back... I'll try to publish ASAP. Thanks for reading, and please review or favorite or follow. Makes me happy :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hey, I finished this a LOT sooner then I thought I would! Yay! And not yay! This chapter made me cry! Okay, anyways, thank you to the followers, favorites and the comment from Guest. They all made me smile. Anyways, here is the next chapter:**

* * *

Bucky's heart stopped. Steve was lying there in bed, body facing the ceiling. His face was paler and weaker than ever, and red around his eyes. He coughed hard twice, and Bucky felt tears prick his eyes again. He knew this was the last time he would ever get to say something to Steve. He knew this was the last time he would see him breathing. He knew this was the last time he would ever be with his lifelong best friend…

He took a deep breath, and walked over to Steve's bed.

"Hey there, punk." Bucky murmured softly.

"Jerk." Steve croaked back, and coughed a couple of times. Bucky closed his eyes, wishing it could all be over and go back to normal. But nothing was going to be the same again. Ever.

"Hang in there, punk. We'll get out of here soon."

"How do you know?"

"I…don't. Just… please hang in there."

"I don't know, jerk. I don't know…"

Suddenly, everything went silent. No sound came from either, deep in thought.

After a while, Bucky looked up from the floor, and saw Steve closing his eyes, tears streaming down his face. Bucky sat on Steve's bed, and hugged Steve close to him.

"It's gonna be alright, Steve."

"I don't wanna die, Bucky. I don't wanna die." Steve whispered, sobbing into Bucky's shirt.

"I know, Steve. It's going to be hard for both of us." Bucky said, and Steve nodded, feeling his tears slowly stop.

Bucky looked down at Steve. In front of his eyes was his lifelong best friend. But he was leaving; and wasn't coming back. He was going to leave Bucky forever. He was going to leave Bucky alone. All alone, and Bucky would have no one.

Bucky felt tears prick his eyes again. But this time, instead of blinking them back, he let them all out. He just began to sob, and couldn't stop. He felt arms around him, which he knew belonged to Steve, but it didn't matter. Bucky had been holding it back for so long, and he couldn't control it anymore. Steve could always help him. And now he was going to be gone.

He sobbed harder, and he felt Steve's grasp become harder.

"Bucky, I'm sorry." Steve whispered.

"Can you promise me something, Steve?" Bucky chocked out.

"What is it?"

"Please make it through tomorrow. Please last the night."

"Bucky, promise me anything else. That's the one promise I can't keep." Steve whispered, and Bucky began to bawl. He put his arms around Steve, grasping onto him, the one thing he had to hold onto. But he was soon going to let go. Forever.

* * *

Hours passed by. Bucky stayed at Steve's side for the rest of the day. Both talked about old memories they had together. Many more tears were shed by the both of them, but both just wanted to hang onto the day forever.

But, soon, a nurse came in.

"Mr. Barnes, our visitors must leave at eight o'clock."

"But…"

"I am sorry, but it is a rule of the hospital. You have five minutes." The nurse said, an apologetic face appearing over her stern one. She exited the room, and Bucky looked back at Steve, who let out a sigh.

"So, I guess this is goodbye…?" Steve said quietly, and Bucky pulled Steve close to him.

"Steve, I don't wanna let you go." Bucky whispered.

"I'm so sorry, Buck." Steve whispered back. Bucky held Steve out and looked into his eyes.

"Now what am I gonna do without you?" Bucky whispered, feeling tears spring in his eyes again.

"You'll get along, I'm sure." Steve nodded, but Bucky shook his head.

"No, I won't Steve. I can't go on without you. I need you by my side, and now what is it gonna be like when you are not?" Bucky asked, hugging him tightly again.

"Bucky, I need to ask you something." Steve paused, making sure Bucky was listening. "Please don't always cry when I'm gone. I don't want you to be sad. I always hate you being sad. Please, smile for me, be kind for me, and laugh for me. Because I'll always be by your side." Bucky bit back tears, and hugged Steve a bit closer to him.

Very, very reluctantly, Bucky stood up, but held onto Steve for as long as he could. He looked at the small, pale boy; the boy he always defended, the boy he always laughed with, the boy who was so strong at heart, the boy who he loved most. He was letting that boy go. And he didn't want to.

"Don't do anything stupid till I get back." Bucky murmered, letting tears roll down his face.

"How can I? You're taking all the stupid with you." Steve coughed back, and Bucky let more tears roll down his face.

"Steve, I love you."

"I love you too, Bucky.

"And I'll always love you, until the end of the line."

"Till the end of the line." Steve agreed, and watched his best friend leave the room, leave the hospital, leave him. Steve let out a sob and buried his head in his pillow. He was gone. There was nothing left, he was gone…

Meanwhile, Bucky left to his car, and hugged the steering wheel tightly. There was no hope left, every part of him was gone. Bucky let out a sob, and buried his face in his hands. That tiny pale punk from Brooklyn was out of his reach, and there was nothing left to do to save him. Nothing.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Just read.**

* * *

Bucky opened his eyes, and saw that he must've had cried himself to sleep in his car the night before. It was morning now, around eight o'clock. Dread came back into his heart, remembering the night before. Steve must've died in his sleep.

Bucky felt tears leaving his eyes again, and he got out of the car and walked back to the hospital, head facing down. He didn't want to see Steve's body… He didn't want to accept the fact that he was gone, but he needed to arrange the funeral and such…

The funeral… Oh heavens, how on earth was he going to make it through the funeral? Bucky wiped the tears out of his eyes and walked through the doors.

He walked slowly as possible to Steve's room, but noticed there were doctors rushing in and out.

Confused, he pushed past a couple of doctors, and saw something that right then made him want to yell for joy. Steve was lying in bed, asleep, breathing normally.

"Steve!" Bucky shouted, and ran over to him, not caring that he was still asleep. He hugged him hard and close, never wanting to let go.

"Bu-Bucky…?" Steve asked, rubbing his eyes and blinking. "A-Am I in heaven…?"

"No, you're here, and everything will be alright now. You're getting better, everyone knows it."

"So…I'm not going to die?" Steve asked, smiling slowly.

"No, not now. Not now…" Bucky, still hugging Steve and began rocking him back and forth slowly.

"Good. I didn't wanna leave you…"

"You aren't going to. Everything will be alright, I'm here."

"Bucky, I was so scared. Don't leave me, please don't leave me…"

"Never, I'm here till the end of the line." Bucky said, and he could feel Steve's smile growing.

* * *

About a week after that, Steve was out of the hospital, but still needed to rest at home before going back to work.

Bucky always visited, and smiled more and more, for Steve was getting lots better, and now looked stronger and healthier.

It was one of the last days of Steve being in bed, and Bucky visited as always.

"Hey, Steve. You alright?" Bucky asked, coming in as usual, and noticing Steve was quieter than normal.

Bucky sat on Steve's bed, confused by the abnormal silence. The second he sat down, Steve grabbed him and hugged him tightly.

"That day in the hospital… I almost lost you forever. I don't know what I could do without you." Steve whispered into his ear, and felt Bucky begin to hug back.

"I know Steve, I'm sorry."

"Bucky... is there a way I can say thank you for everything? A way to say thank you for all of those times you defended me in those dark allies, all those times you made me laugh when I was sad, all those times you let me cry in your shoulder, and all those times you helped me look at the positive side of life. Is there any way to say thank you for all of that?"

Bucky pulled back and smiled at Steve. "You already did. You lived through that night. That's more then I could ever ask for, and I'm so grateful you did. So you don't owe me a thank you for anything; you have been, are, and always will be in my life and that's all that matters." He held him close again, knowing he never had to let go. He didn't have to leave his one and only, his most prized possession, his Steve.

* * *

**A/N: So, that was it. The last chapter. I'm done, though I don't really wanna be done... I loved this story. Anyway, a thank you to 123petmaster and SiriusDancer for their reviews. Thanks for the many followers who followed this story. And thank YOU for reading! Thanks!**


End file.
